Thursday, September 27, 2007

Those Damn Flutes: an Anniversary Tribute

Today is the 5 month anniversary of the start of the program. I had the opportunity to rip about a month off a Gary Larson's Farside daily calendar this morning. I found something I think paralled much reaction to Aed the Whelpe in England.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Febtober



Today Sophie got a dog. He is a year old, mostly black with brindle and white, and an English Bull Terrier. He is much larger than I thought he would be. I think I shall become very fond of him. His previous owners were bikers--Harleys. They moved to San Francisco and could not afford an apartment that allowed dogs. And this one would be hard to hide. His name is Doc Holiday.

Sophie has decided to rename him, and I agree. She likes the name Toby. He doesn't know that Toby is his new name, however, so to get his attention one must call out "Doc Toby." This was further corrupted by Sophie into "Doctober." I have since submitted my request that his name officially be "Febtober," but have little doubt that whether she accepts the proposal or not I shall call him whatever I want.

Please come meet little Febtober anytime. He seems to like people and new things.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Spare me my life!!

Often, I find myself looking for meaningless, mindless entertainment. It's not that I don't enjoy entertainment with actual substance, it's just that sometimes escaping is exactly what I want. No, it's more than a want, it's a need.

Since they haven't invented the holodeck (from Star Trek TNG) yet, I have to resort to watching YouTube or episodes of Conan the Adventurer which I highly recommend because he is "the most powerful warrior ever!"

Anyway, I came across this amazing example of such entertainment the other day. Here is why I love it:
1 - the music
2- the dancing
3- the backwards bandana
4 - Spare me my life!

Enjoy! Japanese English/Self Defense Training Video

-Jordan

Friday, September 14, 2007

Aed, Truly

Over the summer I learned that I was a descentant (along with probably half the US) of the Scottish kings Aed and Somebody the Whelpe, whose combined names we have to thank for ours. This pleased me as I saw it as some kind of divine guidance and sanction. Well, today it just got better. May I present my findings...

Hayes: This is the anglicised version of the Gaelic Ó háodha, meaning "Descendant of Aodh," a personal name meaning "fire."

Aodh: From the old Irish name Áed, which meant "fire."

I am then Bess "Descendant of Aed." This can't be improved upon, I'm sure.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Who does this remind everyone of?

The answer may be more complicated and far-reaching/wide-ranging than it appears at first. But I think we can all agree that this is the best thing that makes everyone's day... all the time.

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30990

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

The most amazing case in US history?

Today was another hum-drum day until I came across this case while reading about the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure (almost as exciting as the New Federal Rules of Civil Procedure).

Check it out, I promise it'll make your day.
Mayo v. Satan and His Staff

Monday, September 10, 2007

Educational Decree #97786343678455778664324121

I had a very "Dolores Umbridge" sort of moment on Friday. BYU has a new policy regarding tuition this semester. We used to have a few weeks at the beginning of the semester to pay before being fined. Now, if you have not paid by the first day of class a fine is placed on your account, which doesn't allow classes to be added or dropped. I was signed up for 10.5 credits and needed to add John's English class with an add card, which would take me to full-time status and raise the cost of my tuition. I couldn't add the class because I hadn't paid my tuition, but I couldn't pay the full amount of my tuition until I added the class. A dilemma. After over an hour in various lines I finally convinced the power-hungry student employee (who looked like she had recently been robbed of her floral print cardigan and pink hairbow) to let me write a check for the amount of full-time tuition, even though we all knew that I was not a full-time student at that point. As I wrote the check this conversation occurred:

Dolores: [cooing] "Elizabeth? May I ask you a question?"
Liz: "Sure."
Dolores: [still cooing, but preparing for the attack] "Why wouldn't you pay your tuition on time?"
Liz [sensing danger] explains that she had been unaware of the new policy and was also experiencing Catch-22-like dilemmas regarding the number of credit hours she would be taking.
Dolores: [giggling menacingly] "Oh, dear! You must not have received the numerous emails, letters, and postcards that were sent out, or seen the notices posted all over campus. Oh dear, oh dear!" [giggling with teeth bared]
Liz: [nauseous and gritting teeth] "No. Apparently not." [At this point she thrusts the tuition check at Dolores and runs away in a fashion not unlike Napoleon Dynamite]

Scary scary!

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Oh man

I still can't think of a good ole Scottish name for meself. I was thinking about what it'd be like to have a kid named Aed though, and that was pretty sweet.

Tonight is the JRueben Clark Law society meeting which is for Mormons so it'll be interesting to see how many there are. I think there's quite a few.

So how was school for everyone? At least everyone in school. I hope it was everything you ever dreamed this semester would be.

The other day, I was walking through the halls and behind me I overheard this:

Girl: I mean, we were having sex on things like box springs...
Potentially Gay Man: Oh my G--!!

It was really hard not to turn around and look to see who was talking. It's little things like that that make you realize how much of a bubble BYU is. It's not a bad bubble, I miss it sometimes, but it is refreshing, though a bit frightening to be in the "real world." Though so far it seems like people are people Mormon or not. I feel like I could pair up most everyone here with someone I met/saw at BYU and they'd be like personality twins if not actual physical look-alikes.

I think I'm joining the softball team which will be cool. First practice is Saturday.

Wishing you were here....
-Jordan "Knight of the Burning Flower and Protector General of Outstanding Hopes, Prince of the East Wind and Grand Vizeer Solicitor TTT, Marquis of Tweeddale, Order of the Golden Fleece, Custodian of All Scotland" Faux