Super Late Entry: Ultimate Weapon!

It's still the only one, so I think my train gun wins. I just got a photoshop program and wanted to play around with it, but I'm still not that great at it. But here's the train gun in action showing that it is good anywhere, against anything.

And, as you might have guessed, the train gun actually creates dimensional rifts where trains--which the company has going along looped tracks at all times and at various speeds--depending on the setting you use--burst full speed out your gun at your enemy.

There are of course other options. And yes, they have these lions leaping non-stop pony express style so there's always a lion ready to jump out at your enemy... and pounce them to smithereens.

But mainly trains. Olde Timey ones too, but I'll photoshop that another time.

And as much as I searched, I could not find a good picture of 12 year old boys to show you what the train gun could do to them, but you can use your imagination.

Remember "Spare me my life!"?

Guy an a Buffalo

Not the ultimate weapon, but definitely the ultimate.

Challenge the Next!

The other day I was talking with a friend at work about a zombie apocalypse. We were speaking of the benefits of a good polearm. Much better at dealing with zombies because it gives you some breathing room and doesn't run out of bullets. And yet, bullets sure are nice in a zombie apocalypse. While they last. Anyway, so we started thinking of rifle/polearms which are not just rifle's with bayonets. As it got more elaborate--a staff with blades on both ends and somehow shooting out of both or one end as well--I got to thinking, what IS the ultimate weapon? Surely the interweb could help give some awesome ideas. So I googled it and came up with... nothing much.

I mean, it's fun and all, but I was hoping for something plenty more ultimate. There were some swords, some guns, some crowbars with sniper sights, but nothing really ultimate. Googling "Most Dangerous Weapon" didn't drastically improve results.

 Panzer bot is pretty awesome, but it's not quite ultimate. Is this not a gross oversight? Google most dangerous animal and you'll get tons of awesome stuff from a shark/elephant to bearsharktopus to this:

 Anyway, the challenge I propose, if Aed's still up for challenges, is to come up with and post the ultimate weapon. The internet needs it, those planning on fighting hordes of 12 year olds need it, and the future Steward of Scotland will certainly need it.

Post entries by Oct 20th.

I know it might be fake, but still...

Slapping Lions

This is one of the most awesome things I've heard since Elephant-Riding Space Cowboys.

This guy is going to fight a lion... for freedom. "When I defeat the lion - which I will - I will pull an Israeli flag out of my pocket, and drape it over the lion, and put my foot on it."

Al-Masry: If the event is successful, how will you follow it up? More lion fights?

Essawy: I have a whole series of shows planned in my head. I will pull an airplane with my teeth, and I will pull an airplane with my hair. I will also be run over by an airplane. In between each of these acts, there will be lion battles.

How will he fight?

"I will have to use a new fighting style I’ve developed, which is called 'Life or Death.'"

What does that fighting style consist of?

"Everything. It consists of a series of combination moves. I will start off with the slaps, but, you should know, my slaps are unlike any other. My strength is truly incredible and unprecedented."

Anyway, I should stop cutting and pasting some awesome bits from the interview. It's all awesome. All the time.

Just overheard while walking across the U of U campus...

"So, do you think animals have STDs?"

That's the question...what do you think?

Helloooooooo! Is anyone still out there?